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Coffee 7:20 Sat Mar 4
Saturday football (with added predictions from Hammer and Pickle)

With just over two months of the season remaining, there’s all to play for at both ends of the table (not to mention that middle bit around 10th spot). Hammer and Pickle has kindly been given leave by Vladimir Putin to share his predictions for today’s games.


MAN UTD vs BOURNEMOUTH (1230 ko)
The Cherries’ form has turned sour of late and they come into this on the back of four straight defeats. Man U’s form on the other hand has blossomed recently and their confidence will be high after raising the EFL Cup and winning all of their last six games. There should be goals aplenty in today’s early fixture and they will all be scored by the hosts. Home win.

H&P: Man Utd 2 – 1 Bournemouth


LEICESTER vs HULL
What a strange few days it’s been for the reigning Champions. First they dismiss the manager who brought them the Premier League title, then they score their first goals of 2017 in their first win of the year against a tidy Liverpool side. They last won on New Year’s Eve against… actually, let’s not dwell on that. This is a genuine six-pointer, with three points and four positions separating the teams. A win for either side could go a long way towards survival. But this is an impossible game to predict with any measure of confidence and a seat on the fence is therefore in order. Draw.

H&P: Leicester 1 – 1 Hull


STOKE vs MIDDLESBORO
It was all going so well for Boro as they banked a point here and a point there and bobbed around a few places above the drop zone. All that separates them now from the bottom three is goal difference. They’re up against a Stoke team that should be smarting from their drubbing at Spurs last weekend and although their recent form has been inconsistent, they’re still capable of turning it on. You have to feel for Boro, but fear that even Teesside’s most robust rearguard won’t stop Stoke grabbing all the points. Home win.

H&P: Stoke 3 – 0 Middlesbrough


SWANSEA vs BURNLEY
16th hosts 11th. Surprised? Pay more attention to the table then. It wasn’t so long ago that Swansea were dead certs for the drop. No longer. They’ve performed half a miracle by pulling themselves out of the relegation places, but Paul Clement will know that he absolutely cannot afford to rest on his laurels. If he can keep the Swans up this season, you’d expect him to be a contender for the Arsenal job when that becomes vacant. Burnley’s away form has been horrendous all season and there’s no reason to think that will change against the Jack Army today. Home win.

H&P: Swansea 0 – 2 Burnley


WATFORD vs SOUTHAMPTON
The Saints will feel hard done by at Wembley last Sunday. But at least they outsung the Mancs. Watford have drawn against us, lost to Millwall and Man U, and beaten Arsenal and Burnley in their last five outings. Southampton have lost against us, Man U, Swansea and Arsenal, beating only Sunderland in the same timeframe. What can you make of that? Not a great deal, although Watford have the edge in form. This will be either a home win or an away win, but it might also be a draw. Where’s that fence gone? Draw.

H&P: Watford 2 – 1 Southampton


WEST BROM vs CRYSTAL PALACE
Two of this country’s least inspiring managers come up against each other once again. The Baggies are seven points ahead of us and I can’t see that lead being made up. They’ll have their sights on overtaking Everton in 7th, while BFS’s Palace remain deep in the relegation mire. There’s little to whet the neutral’s appetite for what may be a bruising encounter and it’s hard to see beyond a home win.

H&P: West Brom 0 – 0 Crystal Palace


LIVERPOOL VS ARSENAL (1730 ko)
From the ridiculous to the potentially sublime, this one’s got all the promise of a Turkish Delight. There’ll be no lack of commitment as both sides will see this as significantly influencing their final position and whether they finish in the top four – the more so as Man U continue snapping at their respective heels. At best, Liverpool could move into third while Arsenal are mathematically able to overtake Spurs and occupy second. At worst, either or both sides could find themselves out of the top four by the end of play. Both teams come into this with some dodgy form, but Liverpool have a record for raising themselves for the big games. It’s all set up to be a cracker. Draw.

H&P: Liverpool 0 – 2 Arsenal

Sven Roeder 7:44 Sat Mar 4
Re: Saturday football (with added predictions from Hammer and Pickle)

Big chance for Leicester & Swansea to create a little gap between the bottom 4 and the rest.
Boro and Palace in desperate need of an away win.

Draws at Watford and Liverpool and home wins the rest for me

Private Dancer 8:51 Sat Mar 4
Re: Saturday football (with added predictions from Hammer and Pickle)

Fair play for finding any inspiration to talk about these DULL set of fixtures. It looks like the Championship.

wanstead_hammer 8:58 Sat Mar 4
Re: Saturday football (with added predictions from Hammer and Pickle)

Pulis v Walrus.

ZZzzzzz



(Probably end up 4-all though!)

Hammer and Pickle 8:59 Sat Mar 4
Re: Saturday football (with added predictions from Hammer and Pickle)

Coffee, who is a proposterous mountebank, didn't mention it was an exclusive and Vlad can go and jump in the moat.

Anyway - happy to get the scores wrong every week if you like.

Cad.

Sven Roeder 9:03 Sat Mar 4
Re: Saturday football (with added predictions from Hammer and Pickle)

Must admit I look at some of those dull teams and wish the likes of some of the Championship teams could replace them
Newcastle
Leeds
Forest
Villa
Sheffield Wed etc

gph 12:21 Sat Mar 4
Re: Saturday football (with added predictions from Hammer and Pickle)

Sven - you will get your wish, unless they abolish promotion and relegation between now and May.

Sven Roeder 12:48 Sat Mar 4
Re: Saturday football (with added predictions from Hammer and Pickle)

Newcastle almost certainly and Leeds a fair chance.

Eddie Howe misses Bournemouth's game at Old Trafford due to illness
Don't blame him

geoffpikey 1:17 Sat Mar 4
Re: Saturday football (with added predictions from Hammer and Pickle)

Hammer and Pickle 8:59 Sat Mar 4

Not surprised you have nothing at all to say about FOOTBALL. After all, it must be draining trying to solve the future of the UK and EU all your waking hours on other dribbling threads that stink this place out. CHeers!!!!!!

Hammer and Pickle 1:28 Sat Mar 4
Re: Saturday football (with added predictions from Hammer and Pickle)

Sorry geoff, but as others have said it's hardly the most gripping of fixture lists.

Oh and you don't have to read my efforts on the other threads. Everyone has a right to their hobbies, don't they?

Stranded 2:24 Sat Mar 4
Re: Saturday football (with added predictions from Hammer and Pickle)

Ridiculously open game so far. Hard to believe no one's scored yet.

Sven Roeder 2:44 Sat Mar 4
Re: Saturday football (with added predictions from Hammer and Pickle)

1-1
Bournemouth pen after a pathetic tackle by the useless fat cunt Phil Jones.

AlvinMartinAllen 2:46 Sat Mar 4
Re: Saturday football (with added predictions from Hammer and Pickle)

Could be the first ever prediction on WHO that H&P has got right?

Hermit Road 2:50 Sat Mar 4
Re: Saturday football (with added predictions from Hammer and Pickle)

Absolutely disgusting big team refereeing

Stranded 2:52 Sat Mar 4
Re: Saturday football (with added predictions from Hammer and Pickle)

Can't have Man Utd's star player getting sent off!

Sven Roeder 2:53 Sat Mar 4
Re: Saturday football (with added predictions from Hammer and Pickle)

Don't think Man U have played well but they probably should be winning about 4-1

Zlatan elbows Mings in the head and the ref talks to him for about 5 mins
And then sends Surman off 5 mins after booking him for the second time. Word in his ear from the 4th official?

With video technology Mings and Zlatan would both be off

fraser 2:53 Sat Mar 4
Re: Saturday football (with added predictions from Hammer and Pickle)

Unbelievable big team bias again

Headtheball 2:54 Sat Mar 4
Re: Saturday football (with added predictions from Hammer and Pickle)

Disgraceful refereeing and Neville trying to deflect the blame onto Bournemouth. Bottled it.
When was the last time a Man Utd player been sent off at Old Traffo8?

goose 2:54 Sat Mar 4
Re: Saturday football (with added predictions from Hammer and Pickle)

Absolute shocker from the ref there, this is becoming a regular occurrence sadly.

ted fenton 2:55 Sat Mar 4
Re: Saturday football (with added predictions from Hammer and Pickle)

He'll get done but we all know it should 10 against 10 !!!
Good entertainment though :-)

cholo 2:56 Sat Mar 4
Re: Saturday football (with added predictions from Hammer and Pickle)

The ref was all over the place there, how did no one spot that elbow?

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